Sonic Youth | OK Cupid Letters That Never Got Responses

It is once again another Sunday night and I am internally cringing at the thought of another work-week commencing at 9am (which means that I have to wake up about 7 hours from the moment I am typing this sentence, which will probably mean much less sleep than that by the time this is posted and my mind shuts the fuck up), but after recently being grabbed by the shirt collar by my unhinged boss (he seriously has issues) and then offered a half-assed promotion/raise (one of those issues is that he is a cheap fuck) when he realized that I was about to walk out of there (if I had ANY money, I would have walked out anyway, but times being what they are… I sadly need this job just a tad more than my self-respect. At least for a little while longer. Hopefully when summer is over, something will appear), it means that if I show up to work, I will earn (on average) an extra $16 a day, which doesn’t sound like much, but on a two-week paycheck, it’s significant. After even a paycheck with just two days of the new position, it made a difference. Not much of one, as I’m still too poor to pay all my bills, but I’m getting closer.

I am trying to post these on the regular again, which is hard with all these weddings and summer things going on (2 consecutive Saturdays and 2 consecutive weddings down and one more to go), and the excessive drinking that comes with being unhappy with oneself while people around you are getting married, having kids, getting actual decent jobs, etc. Regardless, I will write myself out of this rut and that begins now!

I was looking over possible candidates for letters to publish tonight, and this one caught my fancy, because the second paragraph in my initial letter is exactly the kind of writing that comes out of me when I am in the zone, and it makes me almost remember how awesome I’m supposed to be. Also, she wrote back, so it proves that sometimes, these things actually happen. I then wrote her back, but after that…nothing. I wish I knew what happened, and I wish there was a profile still there. Somewhere out there is a Kate I almost went on a date with, and yet, I do not know what she looks like anymore, should I ever pass her on the street or at a Sonic Youth show (see this post, which I thought I posted somewhere on the internet, but couldn’t find).

Also, I know what many of you are thinking – “One American using ‘cheers’ in an email is bad enough, but TWO? Those tossers deserve each other. To hell with the lot of them!” And then maybe you’re also thinking I went a little overboard on the music nerdery, and in this instance, I would concur. I found myself cringing just a tad when I got to the paragraph about Billy Childish. But that show WAS AMAZING!! I was sitting two feet away from the man himself! I know I have one friend who probably hates me for having been there. Oh and for anyone keeping score, I’ve definitely heard the Vivian Girls in the ensuing four years since this message was sent, way back in the days when I had a decent job, an apartment in Brooklyn, and there was a stupid frat boy in the White House whose awesomeness at his job led to all of that disappearing.

RE:trying to figure out the matching system here

Sent to drumsnguitar

Aug 30, 2008 – 2:06pm

Sorry, drumsnguitar no longer has an account.

Hi there,

60% strikes me as odd when you compare our interests and favorite bands (although to be fair, I didn’t properly list my favorite bands on here, so the fact that I’m heavily into C86 and the Wedding Present doesn’t show up, but there are no questions about C86 on this site), love of banter and repartee and food. Does this mean that you can’t judge a person by what they like, but what they’re like? Because I find when I meet people who may have similar dispositions, but dissimilar tastes, I don’t know what to say or talk about.

So, you’re into a lot of the same stuff as me, but perhaps you eat babies (well, to be fair, when it says “likes children” on the sidebar, it doesn’t exclude “…for breakfast.” Now, I’m not saying you eat children, because why would I cast aspersions as tot he character of a lady I haven’t met? But I must say, you probably don’t get too many emails from strange guys wondering if the reason for such a low match rating is cannibalism.

Anyways, I hope you have a lovely day. I’m gonna go see Sonic Youth. Yippee.

cheers,

—————————-

Sent from drumsnguitar

Aug 30, 2008 – 3:28pm

Hi J,

You know what bugs? There will forever be that differentiation between the Baumbach and Ferrell Kicking & Screaming. I do that all the time. One of my favorite movies (Chris Eigeman is an eternal crush). Which local bands do you like? Tell me about your label. I’m working on a piece about Vivian Girls and Crystal Stilts, both very C86/Flying Nun.

Where did you live in Seattle? I moved from there last summer. (Lived in Lower Queen Anne. Sigh. Miss that apartment.) Thanks for the note, and enjoy Sonic Youth & the long weekend — I’m envious! I never did get to McCarren for a show and it looks like that was my last chance.

Cheers,

Kate

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Sent to drumsnguitar

Aug 30, 2008 – 10:47pm

Helloooo Kate,

I totally hear you about Kicking & Screaming. I remember when the WIll Ferrel movie came out, I was all indignant about it. Also, Chris Eigeman is one of my favorite actors ever. I just noticed how all the Whit Stillman movies were on your favorites list. Then again, how can they not be?

I saw Crystal Stilts open for The Vaselines at Southpaw and thought they were amazing! I had really low expectations. I’m kind of a snob when it comes to music. My label is called ESCHE (stands for Example Such Cloth Hammer Engine – it came to me in a spam email) and I’ve put out releases by The Repercussions (the Long Island garage rock band, not the 70’s soul band or the shitty DC punk band), Space Robot Scientists, Trashed On Fiction (they have a new one coming out soon, and are still together, unlike the previous bands mentioned. please check ’em out at myspace.com/trashedonfiction), who are amazing and The Lord Humongous (also from Long Island and not a shitty Maryland punk band)…I’m still working on getting proper distribution and whatnot. I LOVE Flying Nun stuff. Also, I own the C86 comp on LP. It is one of my prized possessions.

I used to live in the U District (I worked at the Tower there for almost 3 years), and I miss going to shows at the OK Hotel (RIP) and the Breakroom. I saw Billy Childish do a reading there, followed by a semi-acoustic Thee Headcoats set. One of my favorites songs right now is the solo version of “You Make Me Die” on the cd “At The Bridge” – plus, my iPod likes to play The Buff Medways.

Oh, the Vivian Girls opened for SY, but I missed them. Haven’t heard them yet. But I own the Monks of Doom cd with the song of that name on it.

wow, i could probably talk forever about music and movies, etc…and my friends’ band is supposed to go on at 11 and it’s 10:45 and i’m still in williamsburg. they’re playing at Lit. yikes.

maybe we should meet up for coffee or drinks and chat it up?

hope your weekend is awesome (although it can’t be as awesome as mine because Sonic Youth played “Making The Nature Scene.” Sorry.

Oh and Josef K is the bomb. I just played them for my bff and she went apeshit.

–j

It’s currently midnight on a Sunday, and I’m watching “Supernatural” on the DVR, when I should be updating this blog while sleeping. I have work at 9am, but I feel like if I don’t do this now, I will only set the stage for more slacking off in the future. As much as I love sleep, I have come to realize that my commitment to the written (and/or typed) word will almost always trump sleep. Hell, if I had sick days at this job, I would take one to work on some of my book, as well as the essay I’m writing about how Sonic Youth‘s video for “Dirty Boots” ruined my expectations for romantic love at the dawn of the Grunge Era. I’d been wanting to write it for awhile, but with the recent Thurston Moore/Kim Gordon split, it seems timely. Of course, by the time I actually finish it, it will be old hat.

So now it’s a little after 1am and I am trying to focus harder by listening to Reading, Writing and Arithmetic by The Sundays. It takes me back to a simpler time, when I was about 16, blue, and I had a crush on some cute English singer in a band whom I would never meet; but that slim chance was equal to the lack of action I was experiencing with the girls in my high school as the 80s were fleeting into the rearview mirror and senior year was rapidly approaching, complete with the promise of getting the hell out of this one horse town (actually, our town had at least one stable, so we had more than just one horse in a literal sense, but, aside from a brief period of time in 1991-1992, we had zero record stores, but nobody ever says “I had to leave that none record store town”).

Back then, I had no idea that I was being primed for a life of seeing things differently than other people, that I was going to be on the fringes of groups of friends forever, like a talentless James Joyce – always observing and writing, but never quite belonging to a circle the way everyone else seems to, but yet never NOT belonging. I guess that makes me kind of like an electron. I bounce from group to group, and while, never rejected and even accepted, I just always feel like an outsider. Most of the time, I don’t mind. But once in a while, the need to feel a close and lasting bond to another human being not related to you gets strong. And that’s where these letters come in. While I know deep down that the odds of me finding lasting and true love from a free dating website are low, I’m just enough of a hopeless romantic to at least give it a try. And then I write something like the letter below.

What I will say in my defense in regards to this particular letter, is that at least I pointed out to the young woman what parts were me being funny (on purpose), as opposed to the trainwreck conversation from a few months ago where the young lady had no idea what the fuck I was talking about. I’m just kind of bummed that I didn’t get to post this before the profile was deleted. I wish I could remember what she looked like, since I made the mistake of showing my cards and complimenting her looks, which as we all now know from the overlords of OK Cupid and their little OK Trends blog, is a turn-off. I’m good at those. Someone somewhere, I’m convinced, has a list of turn-offs that include my name.

to prove that I don’t take anything too seriously
Sent to _ariadne
Feb 11, 2010 – 2:46am

Sorry, _ariadne no longer has an account

I am going to tell the truth and say that when I read your three adjectives, my first thought was “I’d like to insert something witty, alright.”

But then I figured that was a bad idea, but if I have learned anything in this life, it’s that you should stick to your guns. Then again, my default photo is of me behind the stairs eating pizza.

Seriously, though, you like a lot of the same things I do, and you totally seem like the kind of woman I would like to get drinks with and talk about life and philosophy and get fondue with (I’ve never had fondue or ice-skated). Is it funny that the girl who grew up in Saudi Arabia has ice-skated but the guy who grew up 5 minutes from an ice rink has not? I played a lot of street hockey, but never on skates of either variety.

Oh and the first paragraph wasn’t me trying to be funny. the second paragraph, however, was. Also, allow me to close this letter by saying that you look absolutely radiant in your photos.

Look forward to chatting with you,