This is the first in a series of letters I’ve sent to women on OkCupid.com that did not receive responses. I have left in usernames, match statistics and dates to prove that these are real. I have also tried to keep fixing typos and things to a minimum, as these errors may give clues as to why no response was received, since, of course, I am awesome (and yet still single, ladies). Did I mention that I cook? Oh, also, I welcome all comments on theories as to why I never got a response. Well, without further ado, here is the virginal post!
dropping a line
Sent to _ellie
14% Enemy 68% Friend 84% Match
Mar. 17, 2008 – 11:01pm
Hi there! I’m hoping this doesn’t come off as too lame, but if your photos are accurate, you’re supercute. Also, you have really good taste in tv shows. I’m on the tired side right now so I can’t remember if I pasted my tv shows in from my myspace profile, but I don’t think I did yet. I just started re-watching Buffy again and am on Season three.
But yeah, writing these messages is just so awkward, and even though I’m about to pass out, I decided I should write you so that I’m not just a lurkity-lurker in the background or whatever. I’m not usually exhausted this early, but I was up until 6am putting together a mix-cd for my buddy, who is going ot England with his wife this week and today was my deadline. He asked for a London/England-centric theme and I think I managed to pull it off. I ended up making two mixes: the first one falls into what he asked for, and the second one is like an alternate version of the mix. Of course, I discovered at 6am that my iBook’s cd burner has decided it doesn’t work here anymore. I had to send him my hard drive.
Ok, perhaps that’s enough babble for a stranger.
Have a good night!